• peoplebeproblems@midwest.socialEnglish
    51·
    5 hours ago

    In my head there are two ducks.

    Duck A craves attention, excitement, dopamine, oxytocin, and will do all sorts of shit to get it.

    Duck B craves quiet, planning, routine, seratonin, GABA and will do what it must to get it.

    Duck A screams out “I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH A WOMAN I AM ATTRACTED TO!”

    Duck B pulls a gun on Duck A: “I swear to fucking God, if you make me go to a bar, or a party, or a group of more than 4 people I will knee cap you in one leg so you have to be in bed for a week.”

    Duck A says “FINE, ILL HAVE SEX WITH OUR EX WIFE BECAUSE SHES TECHNICALLY SAFE TO YOU AND WOULDNT EVER HURT YOU WOULD SHE DUCK B?”

    Duck B lowers the gun: “Do, you think she would? Do you think she actually would consent to us? After all we did everything she always wanted and we even got healthier and richer. It would be much easier for us as that’s two peop–”

    Duck A grabs the gun “Ok, Duck B. Think really fucking hard about what you said. You’re the smart one. I won’t say no to hooking up with her. In fact it would do everything I need in the moment.” Cocks gun “But how do you think you’re going to feel after she screws someone else again after ignoring you for another two years.”

    Duck B: “table top games and 3D printing until we get grippy socks again?”

    Duck A: “FUCK YEAH LET’S PAINT MORE MINIS”