Why do Americans give Santa cookies and milk? He’s not 5 years old. Leave him a glass of water, and a couple of ibuprofen. He’s not feeling great after every child in Britain left him a mince pie and an alcoholic beverage.
Ibuprofen and alcohol do not mix well. Well except you want totally get hammered
What? Drinking while taking ibuprofen just increases the risk of stomach bleeding and ulcers, it doesn’t get you hammered.
…because a 5 year old leaving cognac and a biscotti might be a bit inappropriate ?
I always left him a glass of sherry and all the other kids I knew left either sherry or whiskey. It’s tradition damn it!
I eat dairy still but oat milk is tasty af tbh
Best latte milk
No. Macadamia butt milk is superior.
Ooooh (except for the butt part, what)
I love me some macadamia nutsI tried to type nut, but my keyboard autocorrect kept changing it to but, so I decided to roll withit lol
I have a butt, Greg. Can you milk me??
That does make sense, and I should have been able to guess that by context, but it is much funnier this way
Legit. Gotta be fresh, homemade stuff can be slimy. But oat milk is dank.
How do you find the oat nipples, let alone grasp them?
Oats are actually the nipples of a tiny cow.
The list of vegan crimes keeps mounting:
- This poster is one of the worst things I’ve ever seen.
- Vegans will lie to your face about how good oat milk is. (You made my coffee taste like porridge, you bastards!)
(/hj)
Yeah I like non dairy milks, especially soy and nutmilks, but oat milk is just watery oatmeal…
Vegans are annoying but oat milk is delicious you simple carrot stick. Like many ingredients they are not completely interchangeable.
Poster is awful though
I don’t hear anything from vegans, but I always hear people complaining about them and it’s annoying af.
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Listen I am the first to malign the vegans but oat milk is vastly superior to milk in every way you stale muffin.
Yeah who drinks milk that isn’t a child anyway? Fuck your oat And almond milk.
So is he still milking the elves or no?
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this has gotta be AI generated right? they really have no sense of shame at all
Doesn’t look like ai so maybe they paid an artist
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It looks like a composite. Like they did the main image with AI then touched up some areas or something. It really gives off the slop vibe but not fully.
Nope, I saw plenty of bad art before AI became a thing and this is 100% handmade. Not 100% original though, as the lines were clearly traced. You can actually tell the person who made it is fairly inexperienced in art because they used the airbrush for every single shadow and highlight, so being this anatomically correct on the lines would not be consistent if they weren’t tracing.
Nobody has any frame of reference for AI, they don’t even know what old school digital art looked like apparently. It’s just anything that isn’t perfect or intentionally ugly must be AI.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen an AI pillow shade.
He quite famously doesn’t like a little naughty
Are we all ignoring Mrs. I Love Fiber???
This is like those Onion comics. Like literally, this could be an Onion comic.
We stan a vegan king!
This sentence is the origin story of the Arxur in Nature Of Predators
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why do i still see peta ads despite all the controversy?
Nut milk comes from male cows.
There’s a scene in the novel The Orphanmasters Son where the main character jerks off male cows to get enough calories to survive a North Korean camp. It broke my suspension of disbelief, tbh.
Fuck peta, Milk everything!
fuck peta, milk everyone who consents
Fuck milk, peta everything?
Milks to thin, however butter …
Milk’s too thin, thin thin milk…
lol. In this new vegan-Santa era, are there no more enslaved reindeer? Have all of the cookies been replaced with vegan options? His suit is most definitely real fur. Judging by the gut, the man loves a juicy ribeye, smothered in butter and onions, daily.
In the image, the reindeers are robots
LOL I am an idiot.
