Ok so should I criticize my trans friend for forgetting to change her last name from -ski suffix to -skaya suffix when doing the legal name change to remove deadname?
I think this depends on context. I live in Sweden, so a non-slavic country, and I have known multiple women with -ski suffixes. Some from marriages or being born in Sweden and just getting ski automatically, but I had a teacher from Poland who has the masculine ending.
So I think if you’re in a country where last names are typically gendered, then sure, it can help to have a last name that is congruent with your identity. If you’re in a country where that is not the norm, I think it’s fine either way.
Ok so should I criticize my trans friend for forgetting to change her last name from -ski suffix to -skaya suffix when doing the legal name change to remove deadname?
I think this depends on context. I live in Sweden, so a non-slavic country, and I have known multiple women with -ski suffixes. Some from marriages or being born in Sweden and just getting ski automatically, but I had a teacher from Poland who has the masculine ending.
So I think if you’re in a country where last names are typically gendered, then sure, it can help to have a last name that is congruent with your identity. If you’re in a country where that is not the norm, I think it’s fine either way.
In any case, it’s her name and her choice.