pooberbee (they/she)

Can’t sir

Inhumanely or inhumanly? Both are true

Are the security also laden with turkey?

The punchline is unnecessary because even in life he was an abhorrent mass murderer

They call me “financially irresponsible” when I am, in fact, responsible thousands of dollars of damage to my apartment! My landlord is suing me! Sounds pretty financially responsible, doesn’t it!

Is that snake drinking a margarita?

Never go in against a Sicilian when death in on the line… smh

I wanted to confuse my muscles and ended up confusing my gender

Do they make perps ride on the handlebars, or do they have pegs?

This isn’t a shitpost, this is legitimate. Being able to work through the physicality of emotions is an important part of processing them. You need to be able to cry when you’re sad, jump up-and-down when you’re excited, and scream when your angry, for examples.

“Did you see that ludicrous display last night?”

“Oh, no, I only pay attention when my gender makes it to the playoffs.”

All I see is line go up. It seems like feminine is the right direction.

You ever drink bay leaves from a shoe?

I’d love to. I used to be a very good software engineer, and I think deep down I might still be, but this place has taken all the joy I had in work. I’m not sure how I can get another job at this point where I can barely stomach the one I have.

Me. I hate it so much.

Graphic design. Very graphic.