I don’t ask for much but if the cookie dough god does exist may he produce unlimited cookies inside every evil person on the planet. Let’s go easy, 1 cookie per minute for the first day. Double that every hour until they repent… I mean rip and pop.

But would Jesus complain if there was a mistake in his order, would he swap it himself or just let it be?

The real miracle was creating chocolate chip cookies 1,908 years or so before they were invented.

I really rather like oatmeal raisin cookies.

Jesus warranted being followed even if he didn’t perform any miracles… I mean, whatever connection you think he had to God, the man was a brave anti-imperialist and revolutionary thinker (and a proto-feminist/egalitarian too), after all. Then the Romans hollowed out his ideology and the rest is history.

What’s the point? Water to wine is really cool, shit to fish is also cool. But slightly change the cookie ingredients? That’s my grandmother’s level. She’s a nice woman but doesn’t claim some voodoo-smoodoo goddo powers.