PhobosAnomaly

Now that’s something I’d have expected to see a wave of now, and a comm called jesuswithajob or something. lols.

In the late 90s, there were some monitors in our school library that had some serious grounding problems. You could literally touch the screen with one finger, touch your victim with the other hand, and have your pal repeatedly turn the monitor off and on rapidly at the physical spring-loaded switch - and at some point, they’d get an uncomfortable-but-not-painful shock.

Highly entertaining, guaranteed a bollocking, and after that it was back to the degaussing CHUNNNNNNNGUNGUNGUNG sound. Satisfying as fuck.

That’s beautiful. I love a bit of personal standards to fuck someone else’s day up.

I typically change my responses on the form to Calibri if using MS Office. It’s not enough to pique anyone’s interest, but it’s different enough to spot what I’ve added to a form rather than the usual Arial additions if you’ve been told about it.

Someone at my office tried to say I’d said something on a form when I hadn’t, and took great delight pointing out the slight difference in typeface on the field that wasn’t my edit.

It’s satisfying as fuck coming back at someone with receipts.

A colleague of mine is a nice bloke, but proper stuck in his ways.

He’s done well for himself, lovely family, and has saved enough to treat them all to nice holidays across the world… but all he does is eat burger and chips while he’s there.

He’s been across Route 66, been to Rome, Paris, and some of the Baltic states… even been on cruises to faraway places, but trying some of the amazing local cuisine is just a step too far for him.

It’s wild. That said, he enjoys himself so good on him I guess.

Fuck me, that’s a brave call, seeing as some destinations are off limits depending on what passport you have!

I didn’t think there’d be enough people to fill an Aerial Lingus “mystery” flight without filling the rest of the seats with regular passengers, but then I suppose the people who had booked on to the flight as a regular segment would ruin the surprise within seconds.

Saved you a click: Munich.

I can only assume that the software that looks up the flight code failed to find a destination, or the object is malformed - so in the absence of any destination is just reads “Mystery Flight”.

Quality, though.

Anecdote time: I went for a job interview at the other end of the UK a few years ago, hopped on a flight to Aberdeen. Got comfy, nice flight, decent staff etc - and about 45 mins in the flight crew announced “we’ll be shortly arriving at Liverpool John Lennon airport…” with the rest of the safety spiel.

I felt my heart sunk. Not only would it be an expensive pain in the butthole to get back, but I’d have to make the call of doom to my future manager effectively saying “don’t bother giving me the job because I’m clearly a fucking idiot”.

Turns out, it was one of those “hopper” style services more commonly found on island communities, a two leg flight to Aberdeen stopping off midway to let people off and add people on. I nearly died of shame 😂

what about now bruv?

déja vu intensifies

On the topic of sharpeners, those battery powered pressure sharpeners are satisfying as fuck. They’re shit and invariably snap the nib, but they’re the sharpening equivalent of shoving a Q-tip in your ear and having a good rake about.

Or if you’re all about the procrastination, spending a few minutes every lesson at the classroom sharpener like this one brings back the nostalgia:

Every day’s a school day.

In fairness, it’s nothing short of sheer voodoo what they managed to do with the simple copper loop. As usual though, it was the rural communities that felt the pinch (and the gains) more than most though.

Yeah, people using mobile phones to contact businesses wasn’t really a thing, partly because mobile usage was still taking off when I was in the biz, but mainly because calls to freephone numbers weren’t actually free (or included in package minutes) at the time.

The chances of it being the filter were stupidly low, and I don’t think I ever had a case of the filter being at fault - but it was one of those potential issues that would make a customer look stupid (and £120 lighter) if BT tipped up and declared it a customer equipment fault.

In newer homes (at the time), there were NTE faceplates that had a filter built it, with individual ports for telephone and for data telephony cables. They didn’t last long though. Maybe they were stupidly expensive in comparison, maybe BT could see the fibre future and stopped producing them.

When I did tech support for a UK telecoms firm, that was the easy way to fuck off an awkward customer with any kind of connectivity problem - stability, speed, whatever. Generally, people’s routers were connected to the same NTE as the landline.

“So what we’re going to do, is replace the ADSL filter, see if it’s a gubbed filter, it’s a nice cheap and easy fix. Can you remove the filter from the wall socket please?”

click

Beautiful.

Satisfying. I’ve been scarred by that GIF loop of that truck perpetually approaching the post, and to see the impact is like pulling the screen protector off a new TV. Bliss.

I was talking to my primary-school age kids about their teachers, and one of them says their next teacher will be Mr Smith.

“He’s old,” they said, “he must be at least fifty”.

I said “nah man. Mr Smith is probably only a few years older than me, early forties I reckon”.

They had me with “no he’s like really old. He reads a newspaper”

I miss those toolbars. Static, everything in it’s place, easy to remember.

These dynamic “ribbons” do my head in. Thankfully, I only really have to use Office in… well, the office.

That’s a wingman and a half.

I suspect English teachers - specifically English Literature (if that’s a thing elsewhere, certainly was in England and Wales) - probably have read lived experiences and accounts of what has happened to marginalised people in the past. Being able to critically evaluate texts forces you to see different views of things - the ideal way to foster understanding of other positions even if you don’t agree with them.

Purely speculative post based on anecdotal evidence, but good on them.

ARE YOU THREATENING ME???

I AM CORNHOLIO!

I NEED TP FOR MY BUNGHOLE

That’s us