Auschwitz Survivor Comedy Troupe still the funniest group of dudes to ever exist.

I don’t and you can’t tell me what to do.

Dude I’ll eat a whole pizza in bed. I don’t care at all.

My girlfriend got mad during sex the other day because she rolled over on her belly to change positions and CRUNCH potato chips I left in bed.

I don’t even use old newspapers now. I open a random news site on my phone and whipe my asshole with it to save trees.

Huge box office numbers =/= people calling a film good. People have absolutely been turning out in record numbers for the films, but have all been shit talking them endlessly for fifteen years.

I’m not arguing its sensible. Look at Call of Duty and the rhetoric around how bad they’ve become, but the same people whining always buy them.

My favorite was “Ghost of Al Capone storms White House, issues list of demands.”

You don’t actually know that. Perhaps they marinaded the bees in cyanide hoping the burglar would eat them.

Wait I was supposed to put anal in my prenup? I know porn teaches us to love it but I am struggling to get past the poop part.

The obvious response to this is to guerilla install regular benches, but put wheelchair legs on the legs so we can roll sleeping homeless men into bank lobbies.

I feel like this meme has grown way beyond anyone having read the White Ninja comic.

Our country. We’re fucking people unwillingly together!

Keep goin til we do dinosaurs again.

Oil has a high flash point. You can throw a lit flare in an oil drum and it will take a surprising amount of time for the oil around it to heat up enough to ignite.

The paramedics were the one who gave this to her.

He can just 3D print a second chance at life though, so you’re being kinda whiney bro.

The year is 2032.

Trump fucked around so bad that there is no clear legal basis on who is allowed to be president.

King Maduro is ruling the new American Empire confusingly from an el Salvadorian prison cell.

75% of Americans voted for someone from one of what they consider South Mexicos because he also hates gay people.

Lincoln is replaced by Harambe at the memorial in his chair.

To inhale the nitrous and get high. Call them doing whip-its here.